Sunday, October 28, 2012

Guys Who Don't Kiss

A couple of hours ago I had a guy come on to me on a4a.  There wasn't a face pic, so I asked him to forward one to my email and he replied that I'd fucked him before.  I looked at the stats and couldn't place him:  Latino, medium to short height, and chunky from the math I did looking at his profile.  Then suddenly I asked him if he was from Argentina.  He replied yes.

Two years ago, and last year (he indicated nine months ago, but I know it was much longer ago than that) I went to his apartment to connect with him.  The second time I was clearly very horny as the first time was underwhelming (and, if I remember correctly, extremely hurried on my part.)  He insisted condoms only, refused to kiss, and refused to be sucked (he wanted a "man" to fuck him.)  He was pleasant on the eyes and had a nice beefy ass.  My balls were full and I wanted to drop a load after a dry spell.  Part of the deal was spanking his ass, which I find tedious.  And, he moaned and whined that I made him hurt.  And, he wanted it again, desperately.  I seem to recall when I withdrew the condom was dirty and I am also pretty sure I needed to stroke off.  What I do remember correctly was that he brought in paper towels for me to wipe off with and to wrap the condom in/no kleenex, and apparently no washcloths. 

Well, an apparent glutton for punishment, I went back.  I had more time to spare, but it was an equally empty experience.  I did eat his ass a bit, and rubbed his spincter with my cock head, which freaked him out.  I seem to recall needing to use two condoms (not simultaneously) and again the paper towels.  Besides not being kissed, he doesn't like his pits licked; he does, however, like to suck, but does it poorly.

Since then he has regularly approached me to return.  I have made up lame excuses; I am terrible at saying I am not really interested any longer.  It seems incredibly insensitive to tell a guy who you've fucked "sorry, it just wasn't good and I don't want to do it again."  I employ the more subtle approach; I simply indicate I am too busy.  Most guys get the hint, though I can't say that I've experienced that much bad sex (and, it goes 360; I have had a fair share of guys not back for an encore with me either.)

Well, my Argentinian friend really wanted to get fucked by me. He asked if I had condoms when he established that I remembered him.  So I laid out some conditions that I was sure were deal breakers for him:

--kissing was a must
--he had to let me suck his cock
--no condoms (but I assured him that I wouldn't cum inside him)

What followed was tedious and ridiculous negotiation.  First he'd let me suck him (how generous.)  Then he agreed to no condoms, with the stipulation I wouldn't shoot in him (that astonished me.)  Alot of this was complicated by the fact that his written English is not good (this guy allegedly works in San Francisco for a national corporation, so this astonishes me if it's true.)

However, kissing was absolutely out.  He wouldn't budge.  And, I declined.

I actually would have gone over if he'd agreed to kiss.  And, I would have worn a condom if he'd agreed to kiss.  But, I decided a while ago I simply would rather beat off than have sex without kissing.

On a4a at the same time was a very hot muscular  bottom who I have fucked about five times.  Each time was either without kissing or with dry pecking.  He doesn't like to be kissed, but does like to be barebacked (provided you don't cum inside him.)  And, over the past two years he has begged me to come over to fuck him again,and I've come up with lame excuses.  He finally was direct and asked if I was no longer interested and to which I replied I would be if he wanted to kiss, but I knew he didn't like to (he also smokes alot of pot, which I don't mind, but has referenced snorting meth and I have seen him online in the middle of the night during my bouts of insomnia.   Meth is nasty shit and I want no part of it; it also explains why he was flaccid the entire time I fucked him.)  Well I have gotten a few messsages from him indicating he'd do whatever I wanted (let me cum in him/kiss) but he's also  asked me to join him for three ways (on other occasions.)  I've responded I need to know number three before I'll partake (not always true, but meth users are often careless in myriad other ways.  I don't want to expand my boundaries in that fashion.)

Back when I lived in the Northwest there was a young bottom I used to fuck.  He was insistent on condoms (which I understood) and wanted his ass rimmed for eons.  He'd suck me when he was ready to (he does like to get his cock sucked) and after I'd fucked him for awhile he'd decide at a certain point to stroke off whether I'd cum or not.  He absolutely refused to kiss, he said he found it too intimate.  Okay, that is some weird psychology there.  Well he was young, chunky but cutish, and had a nice ass.  But I like interactive sex and hate to be in the role of just servicing anyone, which I clearly was doing.  We connected many times, actually, but this was several years ago and I was glad to be getting some and getting something safe.  But, it was empty, and I finally stopped going back. He was quite persistent in approaching me, but I was always "busy".  On subsequent business trips to the region he will invariably reach out to me on MH, but I am simply not interested.  It was all on his terms, and my pleasure was at best a secondary consideration for him.  He wanted his ass rimmed to his satisfaction and my nice, big, wrapped cock to massage his prostrate until he was ready to cum.  Then I could hurry up, rinse, and leave.  No thanks.

I have gotten to the point (thank God) that if it isn't entirely satisfying I don't go back.  And, I won't schedule a first time unless I've established that kissing is a  must.  Sex for me is about intimacy; two men enjoying being naked with another man and exploring each others's bodies and giving each other pleasure.  Otherwise, I might as well stay home and stroke to porn.  It's no less satisfying than being asked to serve some other dude.